I love how a mini version of mine & Tom’s frogs are in the ASDA advert, and that in the Sainsbury’s one the woman is giving a large pepper shaker to her next door neighbour. It’s bad enough to be given grinded pepper for Christmas, but without the salt shaker? That’s the pure essence of tightness.

More importantly though, the coca cola ad is on! In snippets anyway. Every other ad you see the train go past a tree and here the singing. You KNOW it’s Christmas when the coca cola ad is on - I’ve been saying this for years (I didn’t rob it from the facebook group but I was pleasantly surprised when I found that everyone else agrees).

:D Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh….such a good time of the year I hope it snows. Usually all we get on the coast is a pitiful 4 minutes of sleet.

I blame the Irish.

So f-ing what? I don’t see any black man trying to be at the moment anyway. Don’t brandish Britain as racist, bash another country instead, like South Africa. Fuck off Trevor Phillips you’re in a high position job and you’re black so stop pissing about and go make some more jokes about the Queen Mother’s bowels.

Recently, I’ve been getting pissed off by Americans. Not all of them (I don’t think even I could have so much hate) but mainly the ones who say, “I love England, London’s my favourite city.” and “I love the British accent.”

Aaaand I have nothing more to say. Bye-bye

 That was indeed the dog’s name, but as my nan always says after she tells us the story of how it got ran over, “but of course you were allowed to call them that back then.”

So the annoying whiney gay bodybuilder has gone from X factor. Even though I hated him, I still think that dog Rachel should have gone. “You haven’t had your chance to shine so I’m going to save you Rachel,” said Cheryll. Listen babe, I know you’re new to the show but usually when you’re nearing the end of the series (I’m merrily counting off the days, American Idol’s on again when it finishes) then it means you’re bollocks.

Overall, I couldn’t care less about who wins the show, but I will be buying Geraldine McQueen’s Christmas song out of spite nonetheless. LET’S HELP STOP X FACTOR FROM GETTING THE CHRISTMAS NUMBER ONE! Last year Leon Jackson won with his mind numbing rendition of ‘When You Believe’ and he butchered the song.

Scottish prick.